Awake

I see the chair empty. I take a second look...imagining you there with that bright smile. The sparkle of life has vanished. I’m not afraid of the truth but I’m screaming at the top of my lungs for you. Although my life sits in a pile of tears and crumpled dreams, I stand strong. I escape the stereotype of a domestic and look to you, oh God, take this pain away from me, I can’t bear the thought of you not in my life. Why did God create me, if all that was meant to be is internal suffering for days on end? 32 days. 32 of the worst days of my life.

The smell of you has vanished. I see all those cute couples and I know we shared a love deeper as friends that few will comprehend. You disappointment surrounds my chest...I love you and I can’t explain why. I’m ruined. I don’t need you. I don’t need anyone. I could wake up every day and never get sick of you.

I refuse to give up hope, even if you are a jerk at times. I try not to think about you. I moved on and then you do this. I want to quit but the wind tells me to stay. I won’t leave my dreams for you. My shattered heart doesn’t feel the truth.

I thought I didn’t care. I told myself not to care because you would just leave like everybody else does. How silly was I to think my feelings would go away. I cannot apologize for falling in love. Awake my sleeping princess. Awake.